Catfish Haiku
- Jools
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Catfish Haiku
For reasons too long to explain I've been trying my hand at this. The first one is by my boss, the second is mine and the final one is from Clare, my wife.
General:
Creature of shadows
Wrenched from its dark warm home
Splashes in my net.
African Catfish:
Dark is its warm home
Dim underwater shadow
Splashing us all
North American catfish:
Sleek fish elusive
Winters safe in quiet pools
Dark water provides
Are there any others out there familiar with this form of poetry who care to try their hand?
Jools
General:
Creature of shadows
Wrenched from its dark warm home
Splashes in my net.
African Catfish:
Dark is its warm home
Dim underwater shadow
Splashing us all
North American catfish:
Sleek fish elusive
Winters safe in quiet pools
Dark water provides
Are there any others out there familiar with this form of poetry who care to try their hand?
Jools
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- Chrysichthys
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I've written a fair bit of Catfish Yahtzee haiku to send on postcards to my sister. Next time I'll post some. To make sense of it, it helps if you both keep catfish and play Yahtzee. I'd love to have a wider audience for my specialised poetic genre.
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- Caol_ila
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...can somebody clear me up how this type of poetry works...
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;
but the silence was unbroken, and the darkness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Haiku!"
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;
but the silence was unbroken, and the darkness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Haiku!"
cheers
Christian
Christian
- Jools
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With apologies to poets everywhere, it basically works like this.
There poem should contain 17 syllables. No more, no less. This is arranged in a 5 - 7 - 5 strcuture.
A good one should contain a word alluding to the season / time of year or if you're really getting carried away, age.
A really good one should have a pivot word which I haven't got the hang of yet.
Needless to say this skill is in doing all this within the boundaries of your own language while actually encapsualting something meaningful (or at least worth repeating) in the poem structue.
Jools
There poem should contain 17 syllables. No more, no less. This is arranged in a 5 - 7 - 5 strcuture.
A good one should contain a word alluding to the season / time of year or if you're really getting carried away, age.
A really good one should have a pivot word which I haven't got the hang of yet.
Needless to say this skill is in doing all this within the boundaries of your own language while actually encapsualting something meaningful (or at least worth repeating) in the poem structue.
Jools
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- Chrysichthys
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- Dave Rinaldo
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Probably all wrong!!
Searching in the cold
Anticipation is high
That cat I might find
Searching in the cold
Anticipation is high
That cat I might find
Last edited by Dave Rinaldo on 01 Feb 2003, 16:51, edited 1 time in total.
- Jools
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Do you normally have snow in Autumn? Maybe you do. I like using Trachelyopterichthys but is it 7 syllables. I only count 6, could be wrong mind you.Chrysichthys wrote:Autumn driftwood--my
Trachelyopterichthys.
Snow on Mount Fuji!
Last edited by Jools on 01 Feb 2003, 09:53, edited 1 time in total.
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- Jools
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The word used for the season etc can really be quite subtle. "Searching in the cold" might be nicer. The word high is an excellent pivot word in this haiku.Dave Rinaldo wrote:Searching in winter
Anticipation is high
That cat I might find
Jools
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- Chrysichthys
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Well, I count seven, but who knows how it's pronounced. Is it a good pivot word?Jools wrote:I like using Trachelyopterichthys but is it 7 syllables. I only count 6, could be wrong mind you.
State of sorrow. That
March morn my new Wallago
Ate all my neons!
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- Jools
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Nice Haiku, but I'm not sure how much of the day going by a zebra can see 10 metres down!Saara wrote:To all my Hypancistrus zebras:
Delicate beauty
Lying lazy in warm water
watching days pass by.
Jools
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- Jools
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The pivot word is a link word between lines and should also have a double meaning. The problem is that Japanese is much richer in double meanings than English so its harder for us.
Japanese syllables also convey more meaning than an English syllable so cramming it all into the 17 allowed is tough.
By the way, the season word can also a metaphor for the stages of our lives.
Jools
Japanese syllables also convey more meaning than an English syllable so cramming it all into the 17 allowed is tough.
By the way, the season word can also a metaphor for the stages of our lives.
Jools
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But when he is in my tank... Anyway, I didn't mean it quite so concretely... but the next one is a very concrete haiku about my Baryancistrus sp. LDA 33:Jools wrote:Nice Haiku, but I'm not sure how much of the day going by a zebra can see 10 metres down!
My mighty catfish
chased away other plecos.
Prize: nice zucchini.
I couldn't be bothered to think about any pivot words, references to states of life or seasons, sorry...
Saara
Ora et labora.
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Ancistrus spawning!
A wintry quest through Sendai
For a camera.
Jools, is this how a pivot word would work: Spawning. Refers to youth. Links up with wintry on the next line. Winter equivalent to old age, in contrast. Or something like that.
A wintry quest through Sendai
For a camera.
Jools, is this how a pivot word would work: Spawning. Refers to youth. Links up with wintry on the next line. Winter equivalent to old age, in contrast. Or something like that.
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Some catfish haiku action...
Well, I couldn't resist... here goes...
Water's edge... look down...
Catfish's trails in the mud.
Gone soon, like the day.
Open catfish mouth
Pressed against the glass. Gaze in...
And see Nature's heart.
Spring water comes forth.
Catfish springs for dragonfly.
Winter yields to Spring.
Irate catfish, fins
Outstretched in indignation.
I smooth my own hair.
Winter roots exposed
At frigid bayou's edges.
Old Cat stays deep, safe.
Whaddya think?
Did I count right?
Water's edge... look down...
Catfish's trails in the mud.
Gone soon, like the day.
Open catfish mouth
Pressed against the glass. Gaze in...
And see Nature's heart.
Spring water comes forth.
Catfish springs for dragonfly.
Winter yields to Spring.
Irate catfish, fins
Outstretched in indignation.
I smooth my own hair.
Winter roots exposed
At frigid bayou's edges.
Old Cat stays deep, safe.
Whaddya think?
Did I count right?
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well, okay... shoulda been "catfish trails in mud", for starters......*sigh*
I'm the proud rescuer of Hoovie, a footlong liposarcus pardalis, who successfully survived sudden disaster, thanks to Speak Easy! Hoovie and I LOVE Planet Catfish! See Hoovie here...http://www.boomspeed.com/rickeybird/hoov1.jpg
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woops... nevermind... unfounded haiku anixety!!!!
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Gladness! A visit
By Takashi Amano,
Much my elder. Tea.
My tank is not his
'Garden of Forgetfulness.'
(I hid my Sailfin!)
Embarrassment. My
Giraffe catfish had dug up
All my Cryptocorynes!
Not its fault, but my
Hemibagrus nemurus
Loves 'Amano shrimps.'
By Takashi Amano,
Much my elder. Tea.
My tank is not his
'Garden of Forgetfulness.'
(I hid my Sailfin!)
Embarrassment. My
Giraffe catfish had dug up
All my Cryptocorynes!
Not its fault, but my
Hemibagrus nemurus
Loves 'Amano shrimps.'
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Can we do catfish limericks instead, Jools?
See http://vtvt.essortment.com/limerickpoetry_nug.htm for an explanation!
Something like:
There was a young catty from Niger,
Got eaten by shovelnose tiger...
Said keeper was dope,
For not going biotope
...
Can someone complete the last line for me?
Dinyar
See http://vtvt.essortment.com/limerickpoetry_nug.htm for an explanation!
Something like:
There was a young catty from Niger,
Got eaten by shovelnose tiger...
Said keeper was dope,
For not going biotope
...
Can someone complete the last line for me?
Dinyar
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Here comes my attempt:
Strange as it may seem,
a Tunze Turbelle Stream
is rushing and bubbling
and Corys are swimming
against that powerful stream.
Hopefully this is what you meant, Dinyar. The pattern is A A B B A, as I think it is supposed to be. I might want to change some words to something similar but more suitable.
Strange as it may seem,
a Tunze Turbelle Stream
is rushing and bubbling
and Corys are swimming
against that powerful stream.
Hopefully this is what you meant, Dinyar. The pattern is A A B B A, as I think it is supposed to be. I might want to change some words to something similar but more suitable.
Ora et labora.
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How about this!
There once was a fry bottom-feeder,
In appetite, he was the leader.
When asked why he gorged
This answer he forged:
"To become a mature bottom BREEDER!"
In appetite, he was the leader.
When asked why he gorged
This answer he forged:
"To become a mature bottom BREEDER!"
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- Chrysichthys
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Strictly speaking, all limericks must be ribald, if not obscene. Do we want this kind of thing in a family forum?....
There once was a pleco named Jim
Who (it must be said) was quite dim.
He couldn't eat algae (a
Sign of neuralgia)
And once tried to mate with a pim.
There once was a pleco named Jim
Who (it must be said) was quite dim.
He couldn't eat algae (a
Sign of neuralgia)
And once tried to mate with a pim.
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- Chrysichthys
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Returning to catfish haiku:
Ten million tons of
Catfish pellets, dropped in
The volcano Unzen.
Producing the huge
Algae wafers--half of the
Gross National Product!
One whole quarter of
Hokkaido, ploughed under and
Sown with cucumber.
Try this search on http://www.google.com: Japan Japanese catfish catfishes earthquake earthquakes
Any ideas as to what species the mythical beast is? Maybe an Acanthicus adonis which outgrew its tank?
Ten million tons of
Catfish pellets, dropped in
The volcano Unzen.
Producing the huge
Algae wafers--half of the
Gross National Product!
One whole quarter of
Hokkaido, ploughed under and
Sown with cucumber.
Try this search on http://www.google.com: Japan Japanese catfish catfishes earthquake earthquakes
Any ideas as to what species the mythical beast is? Maybe an Acanthicus adonis which outgrew its tank?
Last edited by Chrysichthys on 26 Mar 2003, 17:16, edited 2 times in total.
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