Does everybody knows fish-jokes?

[Sfamnun]

My uncle is allergic to fish, so he has sausages in his aquarium.

[bekateen]

Did you know that Panaque and Panaqolus make furniture? Of course, think of all the wood stools they produce!

[pleconut]

Good one, made me giggle

[Wyomingite]

Husband: My BN plecos spawned. I need another tank for the fry.

Wife: Mwahahahahahahahahaha ha ha ha. That's funny, do you have another one?

Ivan

[shrimpkeeper222]

What is ur secret to ur perfect english?
My appistogramma gives me grammar lessons!!!

[bekateen]

From "Texas Jokes" on Facebook:

13124916_1214777645229707_3084849673229889043_n.jpg (18.47 KiB) Viewed 27673 times

[TwoTankAmin]

Little known fact. The origin of fin rot is helsinki........

[bekateen]

What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

TuNa

Ba-dump-bump-tish! (drum rim-shot sound effect)

[catfishchaos]

A lot of trees have anxiety problems.. The ones in the amazon are prone to Panaque attacks ;)

[pleconut]

Lol that's a good one.

[NCE12940]

[bekateen]

My fish are named Major, Minor, Dorian, Lydian, and Diminished. The only way I can tell them apart is by their scales.

[TwoTankAmin]

I am sure this one will draw some flac. Just remember, it is just a fish joke.

What is the definition of a show guppy?
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It's one which you show to the oscar before feeding it to him.

[Bas Pels]

I like wrong jokes.

Still, I happen to be going to a meeting of Poecilia today, the Dutch Lifebearers Association. I wonder whether to tell this joke or not

[TwoTankAmin]

My club had a lady who spoke on fancy guppies last year. I told her the joke, but I prefaced it by saying I personally had no issues with guppies or with people who keep them and that it was just meant to be funny.
She loved it and said she was going to tell it at the upcoming meeting of her guppy association.

My livebearer of choice were the Montezumae. I kept three different strains over the years before they petered out. They are notorious fry eaters and they will actually stop spawning for months at a time. Plus, when the males get big, they also get too slow to catch the ladies.

[Bas Pels]

Here we fully agree. I had X montezumae combined with a cichlid, - now - Nosferatu pame, which had fry, and I intended to raise some. So I took a net and pulled it through the cloud of fry. But much to my surprize, I did not catch any cichlid, only Xipho´s. I did not even know they had fry, so I was quite happy with them.

But catching the little cichlids, less than a cm each, the joke was definitely on me

[bekateen]

Once you read it, mind blown...

[Kilo_SSK]

It took me a while to get it!
... and is that a Code Lyoko symbol?

[Reindas]

I got one and possibly you all know it.

Why did the fisherman crossed the road?...
...

Well just for the Halibut.

[bekateen]

... and is that a Code Lyoko symbol?

... um... well... errr... maybe.

Yes - It was my boy's favorite cartoon growing up. He and I would watch it in French and try to translate. We memorized the theme song. It was a shame that the live action version didn't live up to the cartoon. It's been my avatar on YouTube for years. One day, the Code Lyoko copyright people will come after me and I'll need to change it. That'll be a sad day.

See the explanation here (https://www.planetcatfish.com/forum/vie ... 85#p287585):

Bekateen is a contraction of one of my children's nicknames and the book, The Velveteen Rabbit, which was the first book our kids ever had... Needless to say, we read that book a lot.

And my avatar is the symbol of X.A.N.A., a malevolent artificial intelligence which exists in a virtual world and is intent on destroying the real world, from the French cartoon, Code Lyoko. This cartoon was another favorite of my kids. X.A.N.A. does not describe me (I'm neither malevolent nor intelligent), but we do float around here in this virtual world of cyberspace, so that applies to me. And since this is an international forum, I thought a French symbol would be apropos.

Cheers, Eric

EDIT: As of 06 March 2024, the X.A.N.A. avatar symbol is put to rest and is now replaced with my own avatar:

[bekateen]

A good pun is always in season.

Keeping tropical fish at home can have a calming effect on the brain

Due to all the indoor fins.

Cheers, Eric

[Jools]

That took me a LONG time to get....


Jools

[bekateen]

That took me a LONG time to get....

It is a bit of a niche joke.

[bekateen]

Is it just my impression, or are big pharma companies coming here to find the names for their next new drugs? Cases in point, specific epithets in the genus

Microglanis

:

• berbixae
• leniceae
• pataxo
• xerente

Cheers, Eric

[bekateen]

I'm told that using weed leads to the most fascinating questions: What were electric catfish called before electricity was invented?

Cheers, Eric

[Jools]

Shocking.

Jools

[TwoTankAmin]

Old fishermen never die, they just smell that way.

[bekateen]

Old fishermen never die, they just smell that way.

Okay, that made me laugh. Thank you TTA.

Cheers, Eric

[MarkSabier14]

A newfie went ice fishing. Heard a voice.” There’s no fish there” Gets up, goes a few feet further. Digs a hole and starts fishing again. Again, he hears the voice. “There’s no fish there” Newfie looks up, is that you Lord No, said the voice. “It’s the Manager of the Arena.”

[bekateen]

A newfie went ice fishing. Heard a voice.” There’s no fish there” Gets up, goes a few feet further. Digs a hole and starts fishing again. Again, he hears the voice. “There’s no fish there” Newfie looks up, is that you Lord No, said the voice. “It’s the Manager of the Arena.”

Welcome to PlanetCatfish, MarkSabier14!