racoll wrote:Jools, is it really to be expected that newcomers to the forum are subjected to these kind of "robust comments", just for asking entirely reasonable questions about their fish?
That's a brilliant question and cuts right to the heart of the issue. This whole thing boils down is it better to shy away from confrontation or not. Maybe I was too robust, but it appears to me that when a rule is broken, 100 l-numbers are paraded in a 48" tank or an unhealthy fish is posted by an new keeper perhaps oblivious to their plight then we should not keep our well meaning tongues still? Isn't free speech actually being able to say negative things but, of course, in a civil way.
For example and showing what I mean by robustly, "in my opinion you're killing that fish because XYZ". Not, "maybe you're not keeping that fish in the best way", I mean, "you're killing that fish".
racoll wrote:It's hardly suprising that when people's hobbies are effectively derided in this way, that they'll either fight (like vinman) or flight (leave the forum)?
How do folks progress with their hobby if derision is absent? I agree with fight or flight, but maybe they might just get what all the fuss was about. Or the next reader does. So I'd suggest there is a third outcome which is that knowledge is gained.
racoll wrote:I tend to work under the very wise assumption that "if you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all". If I do have to make a negative comment, I try to make it in third person, so not to appear as being directly derogatory to a person's hobby.
You are indeed a wise man, but you don't appear to have much good to say about my "robust comment" view.
Yes, you're right of course, that there are ways of saying things. It's a really hard job for the moderators because of both the broad international nature and the variable written language skills of the community at large. Blunt, rude, direct or concise - which was meant? And often the key is not in the poorly framed criticism but in the disproportionation reaction.
And, in the end, how does an OP tell the difference between being ignored and not being read? If my "Do you like my new LED skull ornament" got no "likes", does that mean no one likes, or no one listens? My worst thought is that it is actually because some are hesitant to post in fear of being seen as a (LED skull) hater.
Because lovely things grow out of poo, how about we use this topic to have a debate on what all our regulars want to see? The forum only exists because of all of them (and a little bit of work from me).
Jools